Full-time live-in staff might feel like they are the oldest person in the building. Maybe feel a little like they are the supposed “adult” in their residence hall who is there to follow up with student conduct issues, students of concern, and make sure that their Resident Assistants are doing their jobs. They could feel that it is hard to get to know their residents. They may build some good relationships on their hall councils, but outside of that, it can seem daunting to build strong relationships within this job. Students look for a sense of belonging, someone to talk to, and that full-time staff person could be that for them. It takes intentionality and going out of their way to be present with residents. If this resonates with you, please take these next few tips to help build up relationships with students. As research shows, students who feel connected to someone at a university are more likely to persist to graduation. Let’s be those people for our residents. Start out the year strong by setting an intentional plan to build a sense of belonging and stick to it. Use these five tips to build your plan for intentional community building as a full-time staff in a residence hall.
1. Be an Active Member of your Community, not just a Present One
Take the time to participate in events, engage in conversations, and celebrate wins of students. Just being at an event, chatting with a few people is great, but actively participating and joining in discussion builds deeper relationships and lets students get to know you back. If you are just seen as a presence or chaperone, then students may not bridge the gap of connecting with you.
2. Host “Getting to Know One Another” Socials
Your Resident Assistants host events where they connect with residents and do things that match the student’s interests. Who must say that you cannot also do that? Host something in your lobby that you enjoy. Set up a video game and have students play you for an afternoon where you ask them questions about themselves and let them ask you questions. Set up a station in your lobby to make fun sodas or a trail mix, and if they come get one, they answer a question about themselves, and you respond too. You should be engaging with students and sharing some about you too. You can do it in a fun way and with things that get the students having fun too.
3. Attend RA events and Floor Meetings when Invited
It can feel like a parent is attending if you just show up to an RA’s event uninvited. Ask your staff to invite you to things that they want you to come to. Then be active and participate once you are there. Do not take over the event or make it about you. Join as a participant who is interested in getting to know everyone. Setting the expectation that your staff invites you up for not being seen as some sort of looming figure.
4. Turning Building Walks into Social Walks
Stop by rooms that have their doors open. Talk to students in lounges. Your building walk should not feel like a check box to make sure the facility is good. Use the walk to make sure the people are also doing well. Stop and chat, students will get used to seeing you around. Set the culture that you are going to chat with them during your walks at the start of the semester. Informal chats can build the strongest relationships. They may feel more comfortable chatting when they are not in a large group, like at an event. Build up your student’s sense of belonging one conversation at a time.
5. Set Calendar Reminders to Follow up with Students
It is easy to forget to follow back up with someone about wins or a test they are nervous about. Put reminders in your calendar to send a resident an email to ask them about a test. Put a reminder in your calendar to stop by a desk shift of a resident who had an event coming up to ask about it. It means a lot when you remember things, and setting reminders is an easy way to keep up with that.
All in all, the full time sets the example of how your staff engages with students and builds their sense of belonging. The more present, active, engaged, and mindful you are about interacting with students, the more your staff will be too. Students are the reason we are here and so much of our job is being intentional about talking with our students. Full-time staff can get bogged down with administrative tasks so quickly, so being intentional about how you use your other time to create a sense of belonging is vital. Go out and do good work by setting your foundation strong at the beginning of the year and keeping up with it.
Julie Ridgway is a student affairs professional in the midwest who works with the curricular approach and assessment efforts. Professionally, she enjoys engaging in conversations surrounding staff training, student engagement, student retention, and creating creative educational strategies for students to participate in. Personally, she spends her time with her family, garden, and finding new creative projects to complete.
