Students with chronic illnesses deal with many additional stressors that other college students would struggle to imagine. As someone who went through cancer while in college, this topic is important to me, especially as I haven’t seen it talked much about in Higher Education circles. Resident Assistants (RAs) and student leaders won’t always know which residents are dealing with chronic conditions, but it’s important to know how to talk with people with chronic conditions and how to support these residents.
Numbers are Rising
Increasingly, we are finding that more residents have chronic illnesses. This is due to rising diagnoses coming in, as well as better medical care that allows students to attend college. With the population being large and often invisible, it is important for RAs to make sure all their residents know that they are open to talk and that they care about them as a full person.
Stigma
With chronic conditions comes stigma. Residents can be afraid to share their conditions because of the way people may perceive them. Make your programs or boards informational about a or multiple chronic conditions. When someone shares their condition, thank them for their vulnerability. Ask questions, but be attentive to how much they want to share. Do not offer pity. Pity is never helpful. However, do ask how you can be a support. Ask if they are comfortable with you checking in on them about their condition. Please never offer medical advice. The advice you are giving may be laced with misinformation and stereotypes. If diagnosed, your resident already has a doctor who is qualified to give advice, they don’t need your uneducated guesses.
Inclusivity
Your residents may not be able to do all activities if they are dealing with chronic conditions. When you are planning your events, be sure to include activities that people of all abilities can do. If your event is more physical, make sure there are aspects that are less physical so all can still have fun. Residents with chronic conditions may be used to not being included in events, so make sure to extend invites and encourage participation. It can take extra work to help someone be in new spaces when they aren’t used to all spaces being safe or built for them.
In My Experience
As someone with experience both as an RA and as a resident who had a chronic condition I feel I can offer my own personal advice. When I was sick, I longed most for connections and support, but I didn’t know how to ask for it. In fact, I was usually too tired to reach out at all. If you have a resident dealing with a serious illness who isn’t coming to events, it’s probably not because they don’t want to come. Still reach out to them and create community with them in different ways – maybe a note or an invite to something chill. Be attentive and willing to try new connection methods. Your residents with chronic illnesses will thank you for it.
In Conclusion
In the end, the most important thing is to be kind. Be curious and ask appropriate questions. Listen before responding. Reminder – never offer medical advice. Do not make assumptions either. Just because you know someone with a similar condition, doesn’t mean you know what they are going through. Do not label them as “other” because of what they are going through.
Do offer support and care. Be a friendly face. Make sure your resident doesn’t feel like you are afraid of their illness, but rather that you are excited to get to know them as a full person, illness and all.
